034: I Am Yellow
Aug 25, 2022
Two weeks ago, my friend Linda and I were having breakfast in a restaurant when I saw her attention go to the booth behind me to the left. Before I could figure out what was happening, she said to them, “That’s okay; we are both teachers and boy moms,” and smiled at the one boy who spoke to her.
I turned around to see four boys, possibly in 4th or 5th grade, sitting at a booth. The youngest-looking boy had his feet on the wall behind him and his chest lying on the table. He had a lot of energy that morning!
The oldest-looking boy said, “You’re teachers? What did you teach?”
I responded, “High school social studies, 10th and 11th grade.”
He then asked me, “How old are your boys?”
I told him, “Nearly 21 years old, 17, and 16.”
He smiled at me and appeared to want to ask another question. But, the youngest-looking boy, still leaning on the table, smiled at me and proudly announced, “I AM YELLOW!”
My heart broke, and I didn’t know what to say in response.
My mind immediately went to the behavior charts used in schools.
This child had been out of school for two months and referred to himself as yellow.
I have facilitated SEL sessions with elementary-aged children but never taught in an elementary school. But from my own children’s experiences, I know that the designation of “yellow” can be equated with
- * Warning
- * Make better choices
- * Stop and think
The next level down is usually “teacher consequences” and “time out.”
By stating, “I AM yellow,” the boy was associating himself with the label, not his behaviors. Unfortunately, this type of thinking can damage our students' social and emotional health.
Many resources cite the destructive outcomes of using public behavior charts and provide alternative ways to help students manage their actions. Here are two of my favorites:
- PBIS Ditch the Clip
- Emerced Learning #DitchTheClip youtube series (Elizabeth Merce, educator)
Let’s start the year thinking about how we support students as they grow in their ability to become self-aware, self-manage, relate to and work with others, and make responsible decisions.
